Single HOT Sister

What is the deal? WHAT IS THE DEAL???????!!!!!!! I have an issue. And that issue is the fact that I cannot remember where I park lately. It's just better that I don't drive. Why you may ask? Well, because I keep getting parking tickets! Why can I not remember that I parked in the school zone? It's not like it's a measley $25 ticket. NO! It's 50 smackers each time I forget to move my car by 7:00 AM. So not only have I done that once in the last two weeks, but TWICE! Count 'em, one, TWO! I guess the work bonus I just received will go straight to parking tickets. And maybe a purchase at Anthropologie (I spelled it right this time John). Or maybe a gold pair of shoes to go with my new dress.
Why did I buy a new dress? I didn't buy one just because I like to spend money on myself. I didn't buy it because I needed one more thing to put in my closet (which broke by the way....I think that says something). My older brother is getting married!!!! Patti-O is finally tying the knot! This my friends, I could not be more excited to celebrate. One week from tomorrow I will be watching my older bro make his vows to the lovely Alicia (who could not make a better sister-in-law!). Naturally with the older brother getting married and the younger sister having a baby, I have to look my hottest. I say this because I have to! I am the single sister. Do you understand what this means? All eyes will be on me (I'm so narcissistic) and wondering, "when is she getting married?" So you can see that I need to be the single HOT sister at the wedding! There, I've said my piece.
Well, maybe I should be the joyful sister who loves her family and is loving her life! That might be a bit more like me than the single hot sister. That's just a little too trampy sounding for me. Besides, all my brothers friends are married. Well, there is one...but as always, I am Patrick's younger sister! FOREVER!