Bahama-mama

You're going to hate me and I don't care. I'm headed to The Atlantis in the Bahamas on Sunday for a few days on the beach! (picture me with arms raised, fingers stretched in perfect jazz-hands formation, a big shameless smile on my face, and my white flesh gleaming in the sunlight.) It will be me, my parentals, and my travel buddy, Andrew. It's the only thing that's kept me going this winter and it's almost here!

I hate to leave you behind. I really do. I will take you with me and carry you around in the pocket of my shorts. It will be hot, muggy and a tight squeeze when I sit down...just like wearing a pair of spanks.